Reflection and Contemplation

contemplation and quote

Been reflecting lately. That’s why the blog has been quiet. No one seems to be interested in this juicing and modified juicing challenge, so I’m offing it early. Hearing some God whispers. May take the blog in a new direction.

Cursed still in progress

Cursed series is still a #wip but my heart is saying the world does not need a book right now on a magical clan, vampires, and dragons, etc. So putting it on hold for a few weeks… Yes, I will get back to it eventually.

What the world needs now is love, sweet love

In the song of Ms. Stacey Kent, “What the world needs now is love, sweet love.” Starting with self-love. It’s time for us to reclaim ourselves. It’s time to stop self-defeating behaviors and stop feeling lost.

Do you feel lost? Feel unlovable? Feeling unworthy of good things? Are you often feeling unhappy and like you’re just going through the motions, like a robot – even though you have blessings in your life? So then you feel guilty about not feeling happy?

I think I’ve already found step 1 in the journey and I shocked myself when I found it. Wanna know what it is? Can you guess?

Join me on this journey to self-love, forgiveness, and compassion

If you want to follow me on this journey, follow my Facebook writer page www.facebook.com/adjustingyourfocus since that’s where all the posts will be, starting in the coming days, Facebook videos and live feeds (OMG – I can’t believe I’m doing this – talk about OUT of my comfort zone!!!). Some things will be on the blog, some on Instagram, but most will probably be on the Facebook page.

#love #forgiveness #loving #compassion #friends #connect #connection

#self #service #selflove #sad #lonely #alone  #bliss #joy #happy

#happiness #lost

#found #listen #positivity #positive #confused

Meditation Will Make You Mental

And not necessarily in a good way. Well, we may perceive it as a bad thing, but, eventually, if we keep it up, it will be a good thing. Allow me to elaborate…

When you begin meditation and even for a while after, all your unresolved garbage will come up – all the unresolved issues, anger, depression, stuff you haven’t really dealt with. Maybe you ignored stuff in the hopes it would disappear. I do that a lot. Ignore it and it’ll go away. It’s not true, though. I guess it’s true with some things – ignoring those aggravating telemarketers, “friends” that you don’t really want to hang out with or talk to – maybe some of those go away.

But the stuff you truly need resolving does not go away. It’s the same with any lesson you are sent here to learn. If you don’t get it, it will keep coming back to bite you in the butt.

You will only reach true tranquility, calm and peace once you have reached a self-realization. Know your mess, accept it, then let it go. We, humans, tend to hang on to every hurt, wound, scar, as if it’s a trophy or badge of honor we must wear. We cling to it so tightly. It’s downright weird, don’t you think? I mean, I get it. I do it, so I understand all the rest of you. But we are weird to do this – to hang on to the past. We must learn to accept our truths, our pains, or lies and deal with it, accept, forgive ourselves, forgive others, love ourselves, love others (and there are so many different types and levels of love and forgiveness), and then let it go – hand it over to God or the universe or whomever you let it go to.

I know, I know. Easier said than done. And even when you think you’ve already done that, it still comes back to haunt you. I get that, too. More of a chance to keep on meditating until we learn to go through those stages I mentioned. After that is when we can experience the cure – the bliss, the clarity.

Continue to sit still and be quiet. The more time you spend doing this daily, the faster you will get past the junk, deal with it and reach BLISS.

I am not actually speaking from experience. I wish I was. Let me tell you what my experience is. I am in the midst of the storm. That’s why I’ve been so pissy for the last week. I was a little sick. Not sure that was brought on by a bug that was going around or if it was stress I tend to take on from all the garbage going on in the world – I try to escape the news so I won’t know what’s going on, but it somehow finds me and fills me in on everything. Or if my anger is simply from my daily meditation. Or a combo. I don’t know. But I am continuing the meditations daily in hopes of reaching the Land of Bliss. I’d love to know what that feels like.

So please excuse me for my ranting like a crazy person on Instagram and on the blog. My nerves have been truly frazzled lately. I’ll try to be nicer but I’m not making any promises. Praying the bliss sets in before I lose it.

Please excuse my mental-pause.

More perks from meditation:

  1. Healing Sleep
  2. Brain Power
  3. Mental Clarity
  4. Remote Viewing

If you have any questions, google it or ask me and I’ll be happy to answer your questions.

Happy meditating! Or…angry meditating?

😀

Day 3 – Stillness

Happy day! I hope you’re having a lovely day.

Today, I’m speaking on stillness. It’s about steadying your body, as well as your mind. The brain is alive and it’s only natural to have ongoing thought patterns not only consciously, but subconsciously. There is no way to clear 100% of the chatter, or else, well… you’d be dead. Even in sleep, our brain/mind stays busy, whether we remember the dreams or not. Simply focus on your breath if your mind strays. It will stray. Just bring it back to your breath or make up a mantra, like the word “Still”. Feel free to observe the thought as if a passing train, and then let it pass.

During meditation, you must find a quiet space, sitting up, preferably, with your head free. You can lean against something like a chair or wall or what have you but lying down is not a great idea, as you may fall asleep. Rest is great and everything but if you want to gain the positive aspects of meditation, you must stay awake to reap the benefits.

You want it to be a still, quiet place. If you’re on the floor, use soft pillows or a comfy mat. I prefer using my home office chair. It has a head rest but I don’t use that. I actually prefer 100% quiet, though the Chopra and Oprah meditations have music in them. I get more out of the quiet, because I can hear nature. I soooo relax more when I can hear the birds chirping, the frogs croaking in the rain, the crickets (if I’m meditating in the evening), the rain falling, the breeze blowing – you get the idea.

I think the best time of day to meditate is first thing in the morning. I find it’s a great way to start my day.

First, I give thanks for all our many blessings and praise the Lord for all his love, mercy, forgiveness and generous nature. I even thank him for what seems bad, only because I’ve learned there are valuable nuggets of wisdom and learning in those situations. I don’t always get the lesson in the moment but I usually do later, sometimes much later – like years later –  😛  but at least I eventually get it, and that’s what matters. It’s growth. It’s the “bad” stuff that makes me appreciate the “good” stuff even more.

Second, I start my coffee, and after Hallie has left for school or while she’s still asleep (if it’s early or the weekend) and go sit in my chair and get in my 20ish minutes of meditation. Right now, I’m doing the Deepak Chopra and Oprah meditations, as I spoke about earlier. I also like the Android App Mindfulness Meditations for Presence and Peace by Diviniti Publishing Ltd (fyi, I receive no money from anyone for advertising – I try to be helpful for free). I listen to the Mindfulness for Releasing Anxiety Free version, which is 23 minutes.

More benefits you’ll receive from meditation:

  1. Meditation can relieve pain.
  2. It helps you in harnessing Neurogenesis (change the adult brain through meditation). Wikipedia defines it as” Neurogenesis is the process of birth of neurons wherein neurons are generated from neural stem cells. Contrary to popular belief, neurogenesis continuously occurs in specific regions in the adult brain.
  3. Cure anxiety – I could use that! How ’bout you?
  4. Lucid dreaming – Wikipedia says a lucid dream is a dream during which the dreamer is aware of dreaming. During lucid dreaming, the dreamer may be able to exert some degree of control over the dream characters, narrative, and environment. How cool would this be?! I don’t believe I’ve ever had a lucid dream. I hope to very soon, though.

More to come tomorrow. Let me know how it’s going for you. What’s your method? What are you listening to, if you are listening to anything? Also, please let me know if you have any questions. Always happy to help a friend out.  🙂

Y’all have an amazing day! Hugs!

-Carol xoxo

Ah… Meditation is Bliss – Challenge!

How many of you meditate?

How many of you would like to start?

I want to start a meditation challenge and am curious how many of you would want to participate.

Breaking up with Tech

panic

Final Day of our 30 day Challenge!

Day 30 of Happily Ever After and since I’m a bit late in the evening rather than this morning, you can postpone doing this until one day that you are off work, like next weekend, since many of us have to have tech when we work.

Day 30 – Give tech a rest.

If you wrote down the time you spent on social media or reading emails or reading stuff online, I bet it would add up to hours over a day’s time, if not your entire work day, and then some. Get away from tech for one day! It won’t kill you. If you have to stay in contact with your family, use it for emergencies only or to know when to pick someone up but other than that, give tech a rest. And as far as that goes, TV too. Play board games, talk to your people, play with your pets, read a book.

I know tech keeps us connected and for many reasons, it’s a good thing, but we have become too dependent on gadgets and gizmos and living our lives completely around technology. Sometimes, we need to get back to nature, shut off electricity, live by candlelight, live by daylight, embrace the freedom from being tied up with tech for what seems like 24/7.

Break up with Tech, just for 24 hours. You might actually like it and it could become a new staple in your household, like one day a month, no tech, only connecting with each other and nature and the natural sounds around you.

Hope you guys found some happiness within some of these challenges. Let me know?

Until next time…

😉

#happilyeverafter

Take a Day Trip

Five friends in convertible car, waving arms in air, rear view

Day 29 of our 30 day challenge.

Today or tomorrow, plan (or don’t) a day trip. Gather your favorite peeps, get in the car and go somewhere fun, spend a few hours doing fun things and then come back home before bed time. If you are a spur-of-the-moment kind of person, or not, shake things up and do something different.

However, I should say to pick a place within 3 hours drive and google the place to see if there’s at least one interesting thing to see or do or place to eat. I did a spur-of-the-moment day trip and it was not at all what I read it was. The restaurant was probably the most horrible place we ever ate, the worst food, the worst service and had it not been for the fact that we enjoy each other’s company sooo much, that trip would have been an epic fail. Plus, we were in the middle of nowhere land and I don’t mean now-here, I mean no-where. We weren’t in the sticks. We were in the toothpicks. There were fields and grown up grass and trees and that was it. I think this was the one restaurant in the entire one-horse town.

With that being said, just be sure to do at least 10 minutes of research once you pick the place you are headed and find something there you and your peeps will enjoy. And take off!

Share with us where you went, how far it was and what kind of time y’all had!

Hope y’all are having a groovilicious weekend, so far!

*smooch*

#happilyeverafter

Do Lunch with a Friend

Welcome to Day 28 of our Happily Ever After 30 day challenge.

MARCOS VASQUEZ/©2008 RAMEY PHOTO 310-828-3445 Los Angeles, Oct. 30, 2008 EXCLUSIVE! EMMY ROSSUM enjoys lunch with a friend in Beverly Hills. PGmv

For today, make plans to do lunch with a friend. Or breakfast, or, supper, or dinner and drinks, or even with a family member if you consider them a friend. It’s important to cultivate happy, healthy relationships. We must establish strong friendships to be happy.

Some of us may consider ourselves an island, because maybe it keeps us feeling safe. No one can hurt us if we are on our own and have no connections but is that really a happy way to live? I don’t think so. I’ve gone through years of not having close connections with anyone, and for a while, it was nice to protect myself from being hurt by people but I see I’m much happier when surrounded by people that love me and that I love in return, those who are silly and make me laugh, those who are deep and I can confide in and somehow, they understand. It makes life a lot easier when you have such people in your daily life.

So have a meal with friend, either out or have them over.

How’s this challenge working for you, thus far? How many of the challenges have you taken on? Do you feel happier as a result? I’m eager to hear how it’s going for you. Please drop me a line and let me know.

Have a fantastical kind of Friday, y’all!

Love ya!  xoxo

#happilyeverafter

Get Out of Control

funny-baby-jesus-take-the-wheel

“I will take the leap of faith and peace;
I will let go and let God.”
~ Dana Fonseca

Day 27 – Get out of control

I mean, let go of control. It is what it is and if you cannot change it, hand it over to God and let it go. It’s not going to manifest in your life by your continuing to want it, longing for it. You can continue to pray for it but then, try your best to put it out of your mind as best you can and focus on other things you do have control over.

This also goes for anything in your life you hate. If you hate your job and your boss is a jerk and unappreciative, it’s time to let it go, but here, you take control. And only after you find something else first, of course. If your spouse is beating the crap out of you, time to let him go and get out of there fast, preferably when he’s not at home. The things you actually do have control over, it’s time to get in the driver’s seat of your life, take action and own your life. If you have no control over certain things, let Jesus take the wheel. He’s a much better driver anyway.

____

Happy Friday Eve! Y’all go out there and make today as amazing as you are! And you’re pretty darned amazing!! xoxo

#happilyeverafter

Days 22 – 26 of 30 Day Happiness Challenge

volunteer

Day 22 – Volunteer day

This can be at a soup kitchen, helping a neighbor, helping an old lady at the grocery store. As long as you are assisting someone else for free, this is volunteering.

listening

Day 23 – Practice silence and the art of listening

It’s hard for me to be still but I am learning. It makes such a huge difference in the busyness of life when you can learn to be still, be quiet and listen, not only to what thoughts come flooding through your mind but the art of actually listening to others. It’s so beneficial to stop focusing on yourself long enough to listen to what others are trying to tell you. And when it comes to those thoughts floating through your mind, be careful what you listen to. We all have negative vibes that bounce through, so try to not pay too much attention to those voices. Just observe them and let them pass by. Listen more closely to the positive, uplifting voices. You know the difference. These are your God whispers and perhaps messages from your higher self.

read

Day 24 – Read something happy

Look for an article or book on anything uplifting, something that will help to lighten your mood, preferably something filled with humor. Read it.

positivity

Day 25 – Practice positivity all day long

Believe in people. Give them the benefit of the doubt. Not all people are bad. Go back to the old saying, “Screw me over once, shame on you. Screw me over twice, shame on me.” Give people a chance to show you they can be trusted. Also try believing in yourself, that you are talented, you are intelligent, you deserve good things, and practice having faith in yourself. Take your concerns and prayers to God/Jesus and then let it go. Try to not constantly focus on what it is you want. Only ask and expect it, while also taking inspired action toward it. Believe good things are happening and they are on their way to you and your loved ones. Believe it with all your might. When you send out the positive vibes, they will return to you with better results than what you might expect. But be careful with what you ask, because you just might get it. It’s always best to ask for what you want but end that statement with “…this or something better for the highest benefit of all concerned.” God listens to the small details of your requests, so be sure to include them. And just remember, you get what you put out there. So if it’s negativity, non-belief, doubt, stress, that will return to you. If you are positive, believe, have faith, know it’s happening, cast your worries aside, and let it go, then good things will return to you.

hug

Day 26 – Be gentle with yourself day

We are hardest on ourselves than anyone else. Apologize to yourself, forgive yourself, love yourself, thank yourself, be gentle with yourself. Only think today of your positive qualities and if a negative thought comes in your mind, observe it leaving your brain. Only positivity lives here today.

_____

Y’all have a wonderific day and know that you are loved!  xoxo

-Carol

#happilyeverafter

Days 17 – 21 of the Happily Ever After Challenge

tune it out

Day 17 – Tune out negative day

Take one day to not complain, vent, gossip or engage in anything negative spoken or thought about anyone, including yourself. Do not speak it, do not listen to it, and do not think it. Can ya do it?

gratitude

Day 18 – Gratitude Journal

You can do this on your computer, your phone, an actual handwritten journal/book, take 10-15 minutes to list everything you are thankful and grateful for – all the wonderful blessings you have in your life. Like the people closest to you, your health, the fact that you woke up breathing. You can take longer than 15 minutes if you feel the need. You can also do this every day to practice gratitude.

I mentioned this also on day 1.

sleep

Day 19 – Sleep tight

How tired were you yesterday? How tired are you this morning? How many hours of sleep did you get? If you are getting 6 hours and you’re tired, try 7 or 8. If you are getting 9 or 10 and you’re still tired, try 7 or 8. Try to get in the habit of going to bed at the same time every night and getting up at the same time every morning. If you are drinking too much coffee and find it hard to sleep, cut down on the caffeine. If you are drinking alcohol, this can make you feel restless, and make sure you’re getting enough water. Turn off all devices – put cell phones on do not disturb, do not look at it, get away from the computer, turn off the TV. You need stillness, quiet, darkness and rest.

talk to God

Day 20 – Conversation with God and with yourself

It helps to talk it out, whether you are pissed off or just to talk things over, to mull it over in your mind and then with spoken word, sometimes it helps to get it outside of ourselves. Write it down if you want. Say it out loud. Do both. Whatever feels right to you. But get it out there. Your concerns, your prayers, your thoughts, what you want, what you’re thankful for, what you need to do, how you need to make changes, and then make a step by step plan to get it done.

And if you are feeling stuck, have a habit of self-sabotage, or cannot find motivation, because maybe you think you don’t deserve good things, tell yourself this every day:

I’m sorry. I forgive you. Thank you. I love you. You do deserve good things.

And then take inspired action toward what you want – every day.

Three generations of women playing in the kitchen

Day 21- Girls/Guys Night or Family Night

Plan a dinner and drinks out, or get take out, rent a movie and stay in with your family/friends – have fun, catch up with each other. It’s not all about eating, drinking and watching TV. It’s about engaging with loved ones, talking and laughing.

____

Hope your day is Sanfrantastic!!!  Love ya! *smooch*

#happilyeverafter